SpRiNg TiMe

SpRiNg TiMe

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Maddex's due date

Well september 23 has finally arrived! It's the day we had been looking forward to since our first doctors visit and sonogram when we found out Maddex was on his way! Now it has become the day we've anticipated to be one of the hardest on us. As we exist here on earth this September 23, with our dream and hope of Maddex physically gone after holding him for only hours months ago, we have great hope and inspiration to live a life worthy of being reunited with him in Heaven one blessed day. ... Meanwhile, it is incredibly difficult not to think what we would be doing with him at this exact moment in time, how much different our lives would be, and all the "might have beens". Please continue praying for our strength and comfort as your loving prayers will mean more than any of us know in the next few days. ... I've begun to realize that it's not why did this happen, or how did we get here, but how we respond and what we do for God as we endure this challenge.

Maddex, mommy and daddy love you more than you'll ever know!

Monday, September 12, 2011

September is a month of joy, and sadness. First of all, September happens to be the month that we lost my brother Tanner, 12 years ago on the 2nd. We miss you, love you, and will always remember you.
... But, this month also brings about football season, cooler weather, and getting closer to the holidays. We thought that it would be bringing us a baby, but as we sit here without him, it gets a little harder as we see friends and family member having their precious blessings, who were going to be just weeks and days apart from our Maddex. You'd think the beginning would be the hardest part; leaving the hospital without him, and knowing we weren't ever going to get to play with him, change his diapers, or stay up all night with him. But at that point, Michael had decided to become a christian, and that's what we focused on because Maddex helped to make that happen. But now, it's starting to seem that the hard part begins when everyone else is getting to enjoy those things with their September babies, as we have no physical sign left of ours. We are so, so thankful and happy for all of those babies and for all of those blessed mommy's and daddy's, but it's also hard to wonder why we aren't there too. We know, without a doubt, that we are blessed by God putting Maddex in our lives and he has changed us forever, we just really start to feel like we're missing out on all the beautiful amazing moments that we see in others' lives. We have our own precious memories with our son, that lots of people don't get to experience and we cherish those. We just trust, hope, and pray that God will soon bless us again with more children that we get to raise, teach, and grow old with here on Earth. September 23 was Mdx's due date, so with that coming up and and this being a tough month, prayers for our strength & hope, mine especially, are welcomed.
Thanks so much for your support, and give your babies, no matter how big or small, old or young, a special hug and kiss from their mommy/daddy, because there are some mommies and daddies who would love to do the same.